February 08, 2008

heart full to bursting

Yes yes its been a while

I just have to say that I just had my first phone conversation with Naomi, now 2 going on 3. A conversation where she was actually answering my questions and asking me ones over the phone. Where she didn't want to give the phone back to Mommy and wanted to keep talking to me. I'm not sure what I'm feeling, but there's definitely a lot of joy mixed up in there. It's an incredible feeling.

Posted by spoof747 at 06:28 PM | Comments (0)

May 01, 2006

yay for walking

Naomi took her first unassisted steps yesterday.

She then got startled by our cheering and sat down.

Posted by spoof747 at 12:52 PM | Comments (1)

March 26, 2006

oopsie

Naomi had her first accident today. No, not the diaper-related ones, every kid has had a million of those by this age, but today, for the first time, she made a mess out of something.

Specifically, we were having our lunch on the coffee table in front of the TV (yes, I know, its just like college). We had our food and our drinks positioned, so we thought, in a way that Naomi couldn't reach them.

Wrong.

While Jenn was momentarily distracted with the Internet and I was watching George Mason wreck everyone's bracket, Naomi had managed to reach for a plastic bag that was on the table that contained our egg rolls inside. And this bag had somehow wrapped its way around Jenn's cup of caramel macchiato from Starbucks.

And everything came tumbling down, courtesy of She-who-gets-into-anything-and-everything. I guess in hindsight, which I didn't think until now, we are lucky that she didn't spill the drink on herself (it was hot). But in the moment, there is a big coffee stain on the carpet, and Naomi sitting there, of course not understanding what the big deal is.

And my reaction.

"NAOMI!!! That was BAD! VERY BAD!"

And I put her immediately into the playpen. Partially to "tell" her it was wrong, but also to get her out of the way while we cleaned. Luckily, most of the coffee had gotten onto a washable kid mat, but there were still stains which we ended up steam cleaning. She cried for a while, since she doesn't like being in the playpen, but she also spent her fair share of time just watching me clean the affected area.

But now I'm thinking of children and discipline. Is it too early? Naomi is at the phase right now where she gets into everything, meaning cabinets, shelves, bags, and all she wants to do is grab and pull out EVERYTHING. She doesn't understand what not to grab or where not to go. For most people, this means breaking out the childproofing cabinets and gates and fences, but for now, we've held off on that. We've trying hard to be less paranoid and more allowing of these behaviors, as we're thinking that it allows Naomi to learn and explore. But when more things like this happen, it makes me wonder whether we need to start setting limits, and how we do them.

Posted by spoof747 at 10:42 PM | Comments (0)

March 07, 2006

be careful what you wish for

pretty much since she's able to indicate, Naomi has shown a preference for Jenn. and by that, I mean, "when she's upset, only mom can carry her and comfort her". There are even times when she's not upset, but she doesn't want to go to anyone else, including me. A few months back, this was evidenced by the fact that she was ok with letting other people carry her, but when she saw Jenn, she'd lean herself in that direction to get Jenn's attention to hold her. Recently with her continuing physical development, it has only become more obvious. When she doesn't want someone to hold her, she goes limp, relaxing her shoulders to make it hard to pick her up. And even when you do, she starts pushing away from you and looking around for her mother. Even the sound of Jenn's voice will catch Naomi's ear and she'll look around frantically.

I think it goes without saying that this has caused its share of difficulties. Because of this marked preference, we are reluctant to let other people (ie the grandparents) babysit for any length of time, since sooner or later Naomi will want to look for her mom. There was one time when we left her for a few hours with Jenn's parents to come back and see Naomi passed out on Grandpa Hew from crying so hard, and his shoulder soaked from it. That's also affected what Jenn can do each day. Because Naomi needs to be around her and at the same time carves her own path of destruction through everything, Jenn spends the majority of her day watching and cleaning up after the Master of Disaster (my new nickname for her). Also, while I understand that this is a phase that nearly all children go through where they display a preference of parent, its discomfiting to find that she doesn't really want to be near me, and also it lets me only do so much to take Naomi off Jenn's hands.

So it was kind of a shock this weekend to watch as Naomi actually came to me on her own and not actually want to go back to Jenn. It was actually good timing as well, because of our need to work on Peggy's wedding invitations (Well, good for Jenn since she got to work on her part. I wasn't able to spend as much time on mine) It was nice to see that Naomi actually wanted to spend time with me and play and interact with me. We went through all of her toys, we played in all the different rooms, I used all my tricks to amuse her and make her laugh. And it utterly exhausted me to do so. I ended up crashing for a nap on Sunday afternoon, which is very unusual for me and very annoying for Jenn, since from her perspective, she has to deal with Naomi on a daily basis, and a weekend with her (not even a full one) tired me out. I guess that I have to get used to this, since Naomi has shown us that she can switch her parental preference at any time now. (She did go back to wanting Mommy Sunday evening, so the current theory is that she comes to me if she wants to play and she goes to Jenn if she wants to eat or sleep).

Posted by spoof747 at 12:04 PM | Comments (0)

October 03, 2005

Daddy's list of tricks to make Naomi smile

ChaChaCha: Allow her to grasp your fingers with both of her hands, and pull one forward, then another, and then switch back and forth in a "cha-cha-cha" rhythm.
This was one of the first things that I found could make her smile, and it still works occasionally.

Karate Chop: Similar to ChaChaCha, let her grab your hands, but put your face close to her, and have her (lightly) hit your face in a left-right-left repeating combination. Not sure what that means for her future tendencies towards violence.

Swing Low Sweet Chariot: Cradling her in the crook of one arm, swing in a low arc, but at the apex, bringing her to nearly an upright position. Singing the words to "Swing Low Sweet Chariot" is optional.
Also found this early on, when she was only a few weeks old. As a matter of fact, even when she wasn't smiling, she would anticipate this by tilting her head back when the arc reached the top. I could tell because after I stopped doing it, she would still try tilting her head back based on the timing of how often I was doing it before. She doesn't really like this anymore, nor is she small enough where this is easy to do.

Bouncy Bouncy: Works best on our bed, because it is a large flat bouncy surface. Also helps that Stearns and Foster has not lived up to its claims, and there are large soft spots on the mattress. While at some point I will follow up on that warranty, it works well for this. Place Naomi face up on the bed, and put your hands palms down behind her onto the bed. Then create the bouncing motion by pushing down and releasing. By having your hands directly underneath her, you can control the motion a little bit and make sure that its safer. Of course, she laughs harder if the bounce is stronger and she gets a little higher.

Pulling my leg: An early favorite that I found is grasping her feet while she is lying on her back and pulling them up and down in a rapid motion. She opens her eyes wide and her mouth pulls into an open smile. She extends out her arms and lets them bob to the same motion.

Bathroom sink sitting: This is a strange one. She was really crying one time when we were at Viv and Eric's place, and I took her into the room farthest from everyone else because I didn't want to disturb them. Being that it was a bathroom and I was looking to give my arms a break, I sat her down quickly on the lip of the bathroom sink. She immediately stopped crying and looked very curious. Now its a tried and true trick with her. She loves mirrors to begin with, maybe it also has to do with the cool smooth surface for her feet. She then looks over all the items next to the sink and seems to look intrigued as to how there is two of every item.

Who's that Girl?: Basically holding her in front of a mirror and once she focuses on her reflection, asking her "Who's that?" Always seems to bring a smile to her face. My daughter is so vain.

Magic Blanket trick: Really a variation of Peek-a-Boo, this involves taking her blanket and holding it upright over her prone form in a way that it barely brushes her face, and then sweeping it back and forth. She seems to love the feel of the fabric, as well as the little breeze that is created when I swish the blanket back and forth.

Supergirl: Holding her in the classic Superman flying position and running all over the house. Strangely, this is hit-and-miss. :)

Posted by spoof747 at 11:42 PM | Comments (0)

October 02, 2005

musings on missing my daughter

So 2 weeks ago, for the first time, I missed a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Yet I'm somewhat glad that I didn't end up going. Not because work yet again screwed up my true priorities, but because this was the second time that Naomi was going in for her immunization shots.

And the first time was, for those few minutes, heart-rending. Actually she had 1 shot the first time, when she was less than a month old. She took that shot, let out one cry, and then stopped. We were surprised, and figured, "Cool, we have ourselves a tough girl." Only to find out later that due to the immature nervous systems of infants at that age, their pain receptors aren't really sending it out full-force, so they can shrug it off.

Not so with the 2 month appointment. That was the first time she had to get 4 shots. Jenn and I brought Naomi over to the table where they do this, and she was being her normal pleasant self. The nurse instructed us to hold her down. The first shot came and Naomi screamed which resolved itself into a cry. Then came the others, in a squick a succcesion as the nurse could make it. But each time, in increasing volume, she let out a cry/scream, and was looking straight into our faces as if to say, "Why are you doing this to me?" And she started making attempts to get out of our grasp, to avoid whatever was causing her pain. Both Jenn and I were nearly in tears at the end of it, which is why I'm somewhat glad that I wasn't able to go this time. Although Jenn did say that Naomi was a trooper and didn't really even cry this time.

There's something about *your* baby crying that makes all the difference in the world. I remember early on, when we were at a gathering where there were a few babies, and I heard a cry and became alert, only to find out it wasn't our baby. Flash forward to 2 weekends ago at Sueanna's birthday. 4 babies present. I could pick out everytime I heard Naomi cry, everytime she started talking to someone. It made me realize how attuned to her I am now.

Unfortunately I can't say the same for her. Due to the nature of work lately, I have spent nearly a month coming home after she has fallen asleep, while Jenn has spent every day with her. Not surprisingly, she can recognize her mother. She will smile when she hears her voice, she will get excited when she sees her walk by. While I like to think that she at least recognizes me more than say, her grandparents or some of our other friends who see her frequently, I still have to work to get her to notice me. And when she's upset, mom is the only person who can calm her down. There's been quite a few cases now where I've tried every thing I know to do when she is crying and all its done is make her cry louder and louder. Then if I had her over to Jenn, it stops. Immediately. I don't want to be *that* kind of father. I don't want to be only that guy who comes home late because he pays the bills. The books seem to say that babies go through stages where they favor one parent and then another. While I don't begrudge Jenn our daughter's affection (or rather, dependence), I'm looking forward to the time when she'll feel that way towards me too.

A lot of people ask if I want her to be "Daddy's little girl". I'm not sure what that means. Does that mean she has to be a tomboy? Does she have to like sports? I think I'll just be happy when I hear a little girl barreling down the hallway when I open the door after a day of work, shouting "Daddy" and wrapping my legs into a hug. Until then, I live for the moments when I can make her smile, or laugh, or chatter with me good-naturedly. That's what tells me that she's happy, and there's very little that is more important to me in the entire world at this time.

Posted by spoof747 at 01:59 PM | Comments (1)

September 05, 2005

note to self

Naomi laughed when I played "peek-a-boo" with her. It was the first time that it actually worked on her.

Posted by spoof747 at 12:55 PM | Comments (0)

June 08, 2005

lovely day

on vacation.

surfing away.

my daughter sleeping blissfully away. her head is resting on my shoulder.

life seldom gets better than this.

Posted by spoof747 at 06:34 PM | Comments (0)

May 27, 2005

sweet child of mine

Naomi is a little darling. she is one deep sleeper, that's for sure.

Most of the time, she sleeps until we wake her for her feedings. the irony is that, sometimes at the exact moment we compliment her or tell ourselves what a good little girl we have, she gets fussy. Otherwise, she does pretty much what the books said newborns would do: eat, sleep, and poop. So we feed her, rock her or hold her while she sleeps, and change her diapers.

And we take many, many pictures.

DK was gracious enough to give me his last Flickr account, so I will be putting my pictures up on Flickr soon.

Its actually strange realizing that I am a parent. There was the moment of pride in the hospital when she was first delivered, and everytime someone extends their hand to congratulate me (not that I had much to do, Jenn deserves all the credit). But the thought that I am a father to someone will hit me at random and boomerang around and hit me again every so often.

I have a child, someone of my own flesh and blood. I have a daughter, daddy's little girl. When will I hear "Daddy" from her voice? I start to daydream of the day I can mess with the minds of boys that she brings home to meet us. Will she be pretty in others' eyes? Will she be a heartbreaker? I worry about how much stubbornness she inherited from me and how I will be able to deal with it. I wonder what questions she will ask me that I asked my parents and if I will be giving the same answers. I try to figure out how I'll do things differently. I know that I am thinking way too far ahead, so I have to remember to enjoy each and every day I have with her. I have heard too many times that "kids grow up so fast". I figure its because new parents like myself keep thinking ahead and worrying about the future. I'm trying to slow myself down and enjoy each and every day.

It does help that I still have a month of solid time off to think about these things. I took advantage of CA's Paid Family Leave Act and am taking the max amount of time right now after Naomi was born. People seem surprised that I can take that amount of time off, but I fought for it, and people at work didn't argue -- most who had children agreed that the time with the newborn would be good. On top of that, its good time for me to take care of a lot of business that I should do before I go back to work full-time. Cleaning, some house projects, basically, just tying up loose ends before I have to go back to work and won't have the time to deal with all of this.
How do other people do it? How do people have the time to work full-time and be good parents? How does anybody muster up the energy to work all day, come home, whip up dinner, and still have time to be active and cheerful with their children? eep, I'm thinking ahead again. Let me get back to the moment.

I am blessed to have a wonderful daughter.

Posted by spoof747 at 04:19 PM | Comments (2)

May 24, 2005

Welcome to the world

Obviously there is much more to say, but for now:
Please welcome . . .
Naomi Allison
born 10:45pm 5/20/05
8 lbs 4 oz.



as you can tell, she is very happy to be here.

Posted by spoof747 at 08:21 PM | Comments (0)